seas_open | [Les]

They haven't really talked about it.

Between telling Corrine, whatever reaction she'd had -- April doesn't know, but she gets the feeling she should be glad she was out of the room at the time -- and Lara getting rid of those sirens who had been on her ass, it's been a rough week. Her apartment is still a disaster and she doesn't feel comfortable living there anymore anyway. She'll have to clean it up before she'll be able to sublet the place, but for the time being all she wants to do is forget it exists. She's quit the job at the lawyer's office, although she isn't entirely sure why. It could have been a distraction, but the time had come for her to go back and she just couldn't bring herself to do it. She's staying with Les for now, but she sincerely feels like she needs to find her own place soon and she isn't entirely sure why.

It's been a strange week and she and Les haven't talked much about what they're doing or what's been going on and she thinks they should, but at the same time she isn't really sure she wants to.

For now she's camped out on his couch in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, a computer perched on her knees as she scrolls through apartment listings in town. She'd picked up the laptop after her place had been trashed, knowing she needed something to call her own, something more than just the things she had in her purse, knowing it would be necessary to find herself a new place to live.

So she's on his couch with the computer, looking at listings, but she's really not entirely paying attention. She's watching Les, too, and faint smile curving her lips as he moves around the place and she wants to tell him to relax, to come sit down with her, but at the same time she's enjoying just looking.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Les listens to her, nodding back almost automatic, feeling bad once more that it feels like it's Corry and him trapping her between them. He knows she isn't out looking to be Robert's daughter or find siblings. If there's anything he knows for sure it's that. He believes April when she says she wants nothing to do with any of it, with their father. She would just as soon forget about him. Deep down he thinks Corry may know that too, or she would if she'd asked or tried to talk to April. Yet, the bulk of her anger hadn't even been about that, about April.

It was directed at Les, and he isn't sure if that's something he should say. Hell, he doesn't even know where to begin on that.

When she climbs over him, his hands naturally fall to her hips and he looks at her. He tries to forget all that because she's saying things he thinks he still wants to hear. "I'm okay with this. Just this," he tells her. "I don't know what to call this, but I'm not with anyone else. Just you." He's barely been with anyone else since they first got together either way, but he doesn't want anyone else but her. "That's enough for me."

He hopes that's enough for her. Making other promises or calling himself a boyfriend---despite if he wants it---would just feel wrong somehow, would be like telling her he's certain about them when he's not. He needs more time to work out his feelings. If April is okay with it, with keeping things how they are, then so is he.

"That's enough for me, too," she agrees and she's oddly relieved. It shouldn't be such a scary thing, trying to define something like this, but it is, it terrifies her and if Les is happy like this, if he's willing to let this be exactly what it is without having to put specific words to it, then April is comfortable with that. And maybe that's because she's a little bit of a coward, maybe they both are in that case, but she just doesn't want to spend all this time worrying about it when they could just be enjoying themselves. There's still a part of her worried that it's all going to blow up in their faces, that this newfound information is going to pull them all down, but for now she can ignore it.

Leaning in, she smiles and presses a kiss against his mouth before she leans back a little in his lap and tips her head to the side. "Everyone's always so worried about putting a name on things, but to be perfectly honest, this makes me less stressed," she says and it rings a little false, but not entirely. It does stress her out less, just knowing where they are without having to make anything serious or official, but she knows the reason it stresses her out less is that she's scared.

April doesn't like being scared. She's never liked it, she avoids it as often as possible, but here she is, sitting in the lap of the one person who has scared her more than anyone else has in a very long time. And so far she hasn't made any real attempt at getting away from him and he hasn't tried to get rid of her, which she thinks bodes well for the future.

Immediately, Les is relieved too. He didn't realize just how much he needed to hear this from her, even if they aren't putting a label on things, if they aren't willing to say they are dating, or in a relationship, or whatever. He needed to know that April is comfortable with that, and that it's enough. That what he can offer her at the moment isn't being unfair. There's a part of him that still thinks no matter what they decide there isn't a way to keep things from crashing. Maybe their inability to define things is an admission of that. But it's an easier voice to quell when he knows both of them are okay with keeping things where they're at now.

When she kisses him, he leans into her wanting the comfort from her after these hard few days. No matter where things stand, there's still a comfortable ease in being around April that hasn't gone away. She makes him feel good, and he hopes he does the same for her. That it's the reason why she hasn't bailed on him yet, despite his obvious confusion and the fact that his issues with his best friend run deep (deeper even than he knew). Maybe he hasn't been searching for a serious relationship, but the fact that April has stuck around does mean something to him. He doesn't know if it's enough to keep everything together, but it means something.

"As long as we're okay, I don't need it to have a name. I just want to be with you," he says, moving his hands up to clutch her face, pulling her into a deeper kiss, letting his lips linger for a moment. He pulls away just a little. "After things are settled I still owe you that date one day. I don't want you to think you've gotten off the hook," he says, managing a small smile.

"I don't think I'd be the one getting off the hook," she says with a laugh, but she loops her arms around his shoulders, content in this position for the time being, feeling far more relaxed than she had earlier. "I've already paid for you, remember? My money is gone. So it's you we can't let off the hook."

Just as long as it doesn't end like their previous attempt, with Les bruised and bloodied, April terrified and furious. There's a part of her that's so angry with her family for having done what they've done. They're not even a part of her, she's never spent any significant time with them. Her parents hadn't raise her, they hadn't hold her when she scraped her knee as a child or when she had cried. They're not allowed to be part of her and yet they've come here in their own way, trying to ruin everything.

She kisses Les again, a little harder this time, her arms tighter around him. For the first time in her life, she doesn't want something to fall apart, she doesn't want it to be ruined and she doesn't know how to prevent that.

Les lets her pull him into a tight squeeze, her arms shifting around his shoulders until their bodies are pressed together, and he does the same, lifting his arms to hold her back. After everything that's happened, it's nice just to hold her and know that she's safe again. She kisses him hard, and he just kisses her back eyes shut tight. Their words are a relief as much as they are a concern. Just like April, he doesn't want things between them to fall apart. He wants to be able to like her and to go on their date. She did pay after all.

A tiny voice in the back of his head though is telling him that it's not going to be their choice. That no matter how hard they hold on to one another, it might not be enough to keep. He just holds onto her closer, shoving away those thoughts with everything he can. All that matters is the here and now. They said what they needed to say, and he's comforted by it.

He pulls away after a second giving her a soft smile, cupping her face in his hands. "I definitely don't want off the hook with you. We'll go," he assures her.

"Alright," she says and maybe she shouldn't believe him, maybe she should have learned her lesson the last time she trusted someone and he more or less pulled the rug right out from under her, but she does believe him. She does trust him. And there's a small part of her that thinks that might get her hurt, that's trying desperately to warn her, but April ignores it and pushes it down as she gives Les a smile.

Leaning back a little, her arms still around him, she asks, "So what should we do on this date? Do I get to be the boss because I'm the one who bought you?" She's fairly certain that they'll have a good time, no matter what they do, but it's been a very long time since she's been on anything resembling a real date and she doesn't want to admit that she's nervous, but she is a little. Things with Les are different, they have been right from the start, but that leaves her feeling unsettled a lot of the time.

"I dunno," Les says smirking back at her, feeling it a little more now as he pushes away the last uncertain feelings. He isn't very good at planning much of anything let alone a date when he's low-key more than a romantic. He likes just hanging out with her in general, but there is something appealing about the idea of seeing her all dressed up to meet him somewhere. Eating a nice meal and going back to his or her place. There's something very appealing about it that he wants to try. He wanted to try that night he was attacked too.

He plays with her hair in his fingers smiling still. "If you wanna be the boss, I am easily persuaded and I want you to be satisfied with your purchase," he tells her. "Dinner is good isn't it? But you're the boss..."

Edited 2014-10-06 17:35 (UTC)

[Les]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject