[Les & Corry]

[seas_open]

If there's one thing April doesn't often admit to, it's that she's nervous.

The past several weeks have been exceptional, though, and now she finds herself waiting with Les at his place for Corrine's arrival so that she can tell the woman that they're related. There's a part of her that still doesn't want to say anything, that feels like nothing good can come of this, but Corrine will find out sooner or later. Les knows and Bach knows, and April hadn't asked Bach not to say anything. Besides, Les know and she knows how close he and Corrine are that asking him to keep it a secret is something she can't quite bring herself to do. And even if she was able to ask, she doubts he'd agree to it anyway.

It feels a little bit like everything is unraveling and she's always been in such firm control of her life that this makes her uncomfortable. It makes her want to leave Siren Cove, but at this point she's fairly certain that if she does, she won't make it very far, not with those three sirens looking for their money. She still hasn't decided what to do about them, but she's trying not to think about it right now. Not when she's supposed to be focusing on what she's supposed to say to Corrine.

"I'm not looking forward to this," she admits to Les, looking down at her mother's letter. It had been in her purse at the time the sirens had attacked and she's not sure if she's grateful for that or not. It doesn't really prove anything, it's still just her mother's word, but it's all she has. She's wondering if she shouldn't just let Corrine read the letter and watch everything unfold from there.

Comments

[starsfallen]

She doesn't want him near her right now. The hand on her arm. The same hand that's caressed April. Made her squirm and sing. Taken her to bliss and beyond. Comforted her when she found out the news while Corry was away clueless and unaware. The more she thinks about it the more she sees and can never unsee. That he and April have been one in a way that she and Les never have and that they have a bond she can't touch. And it's her Leslie. It's her Leslie, and her father April now has and churning the great angry waters is a jealousy unlike anything she has ever felt before and that she cannot entirely justify.

She whips back and takes a step away. Another time another place she would love nothing more than to bury herself in his arms, the arms that have gotten her through so much, that were the first warm safe things she's found in her life since it all fell apart but she can't. Not now. But his voice is calm and rational, even in the pain twisted on his face, and she owes him that, hates that she's causing him pain but that doesn't quell hers. But she can steady the shouting. She needs a voice. Her lips twinge upwards somewhere between a smile and a sneer as she sniffs the tears to a stop.

"Do you remember my father? Do you remember that day on the boardwalk just before my tenth birthday, when we did that parody of all the townspeople and he surprised me there and brought me that giant bouquet of roses? How he promised we'd be together for the big day? That he'd take me away with him - to Broadway - the real Broadway - and take me backstage to meet the cast - and then we'd go out for cupcakes bigger than my head?" She hadn't thought about this for years. Buried the memory far and away. Not until now. "And my birthday came and he was nowhere to be found. Some stupid excuse in a call I don't even remember. And when he came home, weeks later." The lump in her throat is thick and her voice shakes... "I found tickets. Phantom of the Opera. For the night of my birthday. They smelled like perfume and had a lipstick stain and a phone number on them."

She's crying again and turns her back so Les can't see her. Not the angry tears of before but like the little girl she was. "And you got me through it. You've been the closest thing I have to real family ever since that night."

Corrine looks at him again, tearstained cheeks and swollen eyes. "And now you're a part of it. God, April even has people after her for money like my father! And you're getting hurt. You're a part of the wreckage my father left behind now and whether you knew or not it can't ever be undone." She knows she's monologuing now but she's sifting through so many thoughts and trying to make sense of anything while her heart feels like it's bleeding out and puddling onto the floor.

"I love you Les. But I can't deal with this. I can't ask you to choose between me and her. But I can't do this."

She turns again to walk away. She's not sure if she really wants to. She's not sure if she wants him to let her go or to chase after her. She's not sure of anything except that if she stays here she will completely break.

[lesparker]

Of course, Les remembers her father. He remembers every short-end the both of them ever got because wasn't that the point of them and their friendship? Yes, it was bright and happy and adventurous, but it was borne out of necessity, out of two abandoned children left to console each other. They were joined at the hip because of what was done to them. What her dad and mom did, the lies they told, and the pain they caused. What his mom didn't do. Sometimes her death made Les cherry-pick the good stuff, but if he was forced to tell the truth, parts of his mom were scary, parts of her Les never thinks about or he would be too angry. So, it isn't a question of whether Les remembers that day. He remembers all their bad days because their bad days were also good days. Good because they had each other.

When Corry backs away from him, his stomach drops. This isn't them. Corry's looking at him like she can't stand the sight of him, like she doesn't want him to touch her. And just seconds ago, his own thoughts of disappointment and bitterness at her reaction, at what he knows is legitimate heartache. Because Les understands her pain. He's lived it with her. He knows maybe better than anyone else in her whole life. That's how he sees himself. And this with April has changed it. She's questioning him in this moment, his loyalty to her, and it makes him feel a little sick.

For once, he doesn't know what to do. How to fix any of this if it's possible. And Corry walking away is breaking him, making him think about things he hasn't remembered in forever. How can he possibly relive the friendship they've had in ten seconds. But he nearly does it, and of course he wouldn't just let her walk away from him. Not after everything, not after everything since she's been home. He goes towards her again but keeps his distance and he is a little less steady when he speaks this time.

"I don't want you to deal with it, or deal with her---" Les says gesturing at the stairs. He cares about April. Truly. He does. But he's only known her a few short months. It's hard to even compare the two of them in Les' mind. "You can ask Corry. You can ask me not to be with her and I won't. I get it, okay?" He isn't sure what else there is to say, and he just shrugs with a smile that feels almost helpless. If she needs to go off and be angry at him, at her dad, at April. That's fine. As long as she knows. "You are my family. Not the closest thing. You are the only one. You and me. That's it."

Maybe nothing he can say tonight will make her better, he realizes. He just hopes she's going to come back. "I'm not willing to lose you over this. Or anything. I hope you know that," he says, stepping back reluctantly, but he's willing to let her leave now that he's said his part.

[starsfallen]

She's ready to storm off. To storm off and be broken and shattered in the wake of her family once more. She'd been on her own for so long. Maybe it would have been easier to shed attachments again. To love no one or no thing but performance and the life of celebrity and whim. To go off and travel the world or wherever she needs to be until the hurt stops again.

But it's Les. Her Les. And she's almost to the stairs when his words catch her. Wrap her in a net of assurances and love. He is her family. She and him. If there's one truth, it's that, even after all the years they were apart. She promised she would never leave him again. She promised and she can't go back on that.

At his words, the waves of anger subside. Her shoulders hunch and the tenseness of her stone body melts. Her voice cracks. "I'm not going to ask you to choose." She turns back to face him, but can't bring her eyes from the floor. "As much as I want you to. Really want you to. What if she's your happiness. Your one." She lets out a tearful shaky laugh. "If that's even a thing."

She finally raises her head to look at him. Eyes wide and vulnerable and a little scared. "But you're my one. Maybe not like that. But it's like you said. You and me." She takes a step back to him, shrugging her shoulders in case they might be wrapped in a hug. "I'm sorry..."

It doesn't change how hard this is. That the thought of April, of April and Les, makes her want to run far away. That she's going to need time. But that's not his fault. He's willing to choose her. He would, he's made that clear. How can she make him do that? Maybe the old selfish self-absorbed Corrine would, the celebrity with all the wants of the world at her hand. But she's not that girl anymore. And other people do matter. At least Les. Especially Les.

[lesparker]

What if April's his happiness? That's another part of it, that's hurting Les. Because he knows how unshakable his loyalty is to Corry. He knows he would choose her over anyone else in the world when he's forced to do it. He just can't help himself when it comes to her, they've been through too much together. But it would be a lie to say, having to go tell April they can't see each other anymore wouldn't hurt too. Even through all the drama with the sirens and her mom's money he had asked April to call him. And the idea, that they might become something more, something real, it left him warm and excited. He doesn't want to give her up.

But it doesn't mean he wouldn't if Corry needs him too. If April's connection with her father, changes their friendship. He would because Corry was there before April, before anyone else.

Her change in demeanor is a weight lifted from his chest though. Where it felt like the room was suffocating him, suddenly he takes a breath of air. He would do anything for her, she has to know that. "I'm sorry too---" He really doesn't hestitate to hug her this time, wrapping his arms around her back with a sigh, resting his chin on her shoulder. He understands what she means. Les has lost many things, but she's the one thing he intends to keep forever. No matter what comes along. Ten year gaps. New relationships. Absent fathers. Death. It doesn't matter. He is keeping her.

"You and me," he tells her, and it's a promise. Whatever happens. They have each other. He releases her from his hug and looks back at her holding her shoulders. "We'll get through it. We always do."

[starsfallen]

Corrine doesn't exactly hug him back. She rests her cheek against his head and half-heartedly pats his back. He's quieted the storm of thoughts, the anger threatening to drown them both. But now she's left raw and hollow. As if someone wounded the very core of her soul and left a shadow.

She's still crying, softer now, but the emotion still comes. She can't handle any of this right now. It's too much and even if she knows Les is still really and truly on her side, the ache is there all the same. He's too wrapped up in this. In April. And he'll understand. He'll understand if she needs to step away for a little. Because as much as he means to her, as much as he is so much of all the good she has, it still hurts. In ways she can't fully explain or convey and needs more time to sort through. On her own.

"I know." She sniffs, hanging her head again. "I know, but Les, I need some time. I just - I can't right now." She feels like she's repeating herself. Going around in circles. She can't figure out an end or any direction that can be right now. "We'll get passed it. But I can't. Not right now. I - I need a break, or something. Just give me time."

[lesparker]

He does wish she would have hugged him back, returned the comfort that always been so easy between them. He gets it, but it doesn't mean he has to like it. He knows she needs time, but he still wishes he could help her through this. That's what he's always done. He hates that he won't be able to this time.

He can't help Corry on this one because a piece of the hurt is him. His relationship with April. He knows that Corry is angry about her father, about April being her sister but also about him. Angry that he and April share something different, something intimate that he and Corry don't. Les realizes that then, and he pretty much hates it. It's the first time that he sees it, how the adult version of their friendship has its own vulnerabilities they've never dealt with before. But Corry says they'll get through it. He believes her because he can't fathom anything else.

Nodding, he releases his hold on her, putting back space between them. "A break," he agrees. Even though he's already wondering how good he'll be at that. Since Corry has been back home, they've been just as inseperable as they were as kids. Hell, he lived with her for over a month. Now a break? No Corry time at all? He frowns not at her request but at how hard that will be. "Just. Just stay out of trouble," he says with a half-smile. Well. What else is left to say. Nothing. That's probably the worse he feels, and he glances away. "So. I'll let you..."

Leave. But he doesn't want to watch her do it. He just shakes his head, not expecting the sting. "Bye, Corry," he says, heading for the door and then down the stairs to the first floor, trying to shake off the emotion pressing down on his chest. He isn't sure where April went exactly. But Les goes into the basement, figuring she may have escaped down there. He had given the grand tour when she arrived. Even if she didn't he really wants to be somewhere he won't need to think.

[starsfallen]

"Hey!" She said what she needed to, did what she needed to, but Les turning and leaving breaks the last little piece of her heart and she can actually feel it splinter and drop. She can't leave it like this. Not like this. It's just time. Not an end. Just a break.

"Wait! Les, please."

Her voice is heavy with emotion and raw of the events of the day. She follows him there to the door, to the top of the stairs. She won't chase him. Not when she herself pushed him away. But this is worse. Ending like this, is far worse.

"I don't mean..." She bites her lip, not even sure if he can hear her with the heavy thump of his feet on stairs. "If you need me... you know I'm still there. In a second. No questions. You know that." Her voice cracks again as she nods. "Right. No trouble, got it." A fresh stream of tears finds her cheek. "Can I - we should... Can I at least get a hug first?" As much as she can barely handle the thought of him, right now, in this moment, tangled with everything, leaving this emptiness, this abyss between them and disappearing down the stairs - the moment between them is unbearable. It will be okay. They will be okay and she needs to know it as much as she's assured him this. Even if she doesn't know if she believes it herself.

[lesparker]

Truthfully, Les doesn't want to turn back around. Drawing this out makes it hurt worse. He knows she needs her space and why she's doing this, but just this tiny part of it feels like Corry's pushing him away and that hurts. It reminds him of the time before when she had. This time though Corry is giving him a reason, a promise she'll come back, before it was just Les left wondering what he'd done wrong. It took him awhile to realize he hadn't done anything, Corry just needed time back then too. At that thought, he does go back, heads back to the stairs, and waits for her to come all the way down.

"I know that," he says nodding. He actually feels like he knew that back then too. That's why when she came home a few months ago, ten years later, he hadn't asked any questions. He had just been there for her because that's all he knows how to do. He musters up a rather pathetic smile, trying not to be completely sad. It won't be forever. "Just one--" he says, pathetic smile turning into a more familiar one at her question, but not completely, and he wraps his arms around her into a hug for a few seconds, tucking her close against his chest. Les doesn't linger though. If this is what she wants, if this is a break, he needs it broken. They could stay here all night otherwise.

He pulls away with his hands on her arms. "Okay. No trouble for real," he says, squeezing her biceps then letting go. "I'll see you."

[starsfallen]

She takes each step with heavy feet, each one closer to the reality of saying goodbye. Each one closer to escaping this all.

When his arms find her, she wants to run away and wants to stay forever. She lets out a pathetic sob against his chest before they both mutually pull away, because it's all too much. But it's a final assurance of love, of the connection they share, before the gap and separation.

She needs to leave but it kills her. It kills her that any and all of this has happened. But being around it, around him, around everything now will make it worse.

Corry nods, shifting her feet, preparing herself to walk out the door. "I'll see you, Picklebrain." Her voice cracks again, and she looks away. "So... Bye."

And then she's out the door before she completely shatters all over.