![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
[closed - Caden]
May. 4th, 2015 05:23 pmShe feels guilty.
Lying in Caden's bed, that's the thing she keeps coming back to, the thing she doesn't know what to do with. She can't remember the last time she felt anything even close to resembling guilt and as she lies here and stares up at the ceiling, she realizes she isn't sure what to do with that. Siren Cove was supposed to be nothing more than a stop, a place to play for a little while before she continued onto another city, another population to fuck with, another way to make some quick cash.
But here she is. Nearly a year later, she's still here and for the first time in her life she actually feels guilty about her actions.
They were awful. She's done terrible things to people before, she's manipulated them and broke them, she's stolen tens of thousands of dollars and ruined lives, but it's never been without some kind of reason. The men she steals from often make their money in their own dishonest ways. The marriages she destroys should have crumbled a long time ago and giving the women infidelity as a cause for divorce puts them in a far better position. She doesn't think of herself as a good person, she's not doing anyone any favours, but she's never gone out of her way to hurt people she cares about.
And now she owes a lot of apologies. Spencer and Joel, obviously, but even more pressing is Caden. She'd been so cruel to him, said things she can't quite explain and when she thinks about the woman she's been for the past two weeks, she has to wonder. Is that what she's destined to become eventually if she doesn't rein herself in somehow? Is that the path she's eventually going to travel?
And if it is, why does it bother her so deeply to think that might be the case?
With a soft sigh, she pushes back the blankets from the bed and gets up, dressing quickly in a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. She ties her hair back and wanders out of the bedroom, following the smell of coffee to where she knows she'll find Caden in the kitchen.
Lying in Caden's bed, that's the thing she keeps coming back to, the thing she doesn't know what to do with. She can't remember the last time she felt anything even close to resembling guilt and as she lies here and stares up at the ceiling, she realizes she isn't sure what to do with that. Siren Cove was supposed to be nothing more than a stop, a place to play for a little while before she continued onto another city, another population to fuck with, another way to make some quick cash.
But here she is. Nearly a year later, she's still here and for the first time in her life she actually feels guilty about her actions.
They were awful. She's done terrible things to people before, she's manipulated them and broke them, she's stolen tens of thousands of dollars and ruined lives, but it's never been without some kind of reason. The men she steals from often make their money in their own dishonest ways. The marriages she destroys should have crumbled a long time ago and giving the women infidelity as a cause for divorce puts them in a far better position. She doesn't think of herself as a good person, she's not doing anyone any favours, but she's never gone out of her way to hurt people she cares about.
And now she owes a lot of apologies. Spencer and Joel, obviously, but even more pressing is Caden. She'd been so cruel to him, said things she can't quite explain and when she thinks about the woman she's been for the past two weeks, she has to wonder. Is that what she's destined to become eventually if she doesn't rein herself in somehow? Is that the path she's eventually going to travel?
And if it is, why does it bother her so deeply to think that might be the case?
With a soft sigh, she pushes back the blankets from the bed and gets up, dressing quickly in a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. She ties her hair back and wanders out of the bedroom, following the smell of coffee to where she knows she'll find Caden in the kitchen.
